she was so not down for the gang bang
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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