she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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