About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize