the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
We need to rekindle our bromance
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
