Midget sex pt 2 tonight
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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