Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
