they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Randomize
