No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
