She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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