i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
This is classic penis vs brain.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
