So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
