Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
3pm strippers are depressing
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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