She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
