he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
