I heard we made out
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I have already put on my inside pants.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
