I can't watch pbs sober anymore
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
