I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
