whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
