I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
