Best friends brother. Beat that.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
