Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize