i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
