Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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