Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
