Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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