she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
