is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
