i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
