And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Blood and glitter go together right?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
