She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
