I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
