he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Randomize
