I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
