I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
