i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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