some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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