dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Everything about him screamed your future.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
