yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize