I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
