Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
