Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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