we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Slut skills are useful in every country.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize