every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
