wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
