Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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