rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
