wakey wakey hands off snakey
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Randomize
