Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
