Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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