how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
