this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize