So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
